Ghost Writer
Snooki, Gosselin, Situation, your ghost written books are but a pale shadow to THE celebrity ghost writer haunting my blog today.
Your ghost writers may have been born with silver dipped pens in their mouths, boasting NY Times winners not-to-be-believed in our faux-reality-driven era, but they are about to be overshadowed by a ghostly artist none of you reality divas could ever hope to snag for your next great American novel—not written by you.
That’s because this particular ghost writer has the one credential none of your writers possess: He’s an actual ghost!
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A Ghost Story from RJ & Russell (Spelled with 2 “ll’s”)
It’s amazing how nearly everyone I meet has a ghost story, which makes you wonder why so many still don’t believe in those things that go bump in the night. Only yesterday in our kitchen, my daughter was entertaining two of the neighborhood’s most eligible teen bachelors, RJ Miquer & Russell Finney, when RJ asked me, quite out of the blue, whether I believed in ghosts?
Funny, right? Asking me whether I believe in ghosts is rather like asking George Carlin if there were stupid people in the world. My answer, of course, was a resounding “Duh.”
“RJ asked me, quite out of the blue, whether I believed in ghosts? “
“How about you?” I said, turning the tables.
Both RJ & Russell (spelled with two “ll’s), nodded emphatically.
“Do you have any stories for me?”
Another nod had me excited. “Well, take a seat, young men, tell me your tale and you just might see your names on my paranormal blog.” To seal their cooperation, I bribed them with “Grandma’s” Chocolate Chip cookies, which made them most eager to comply.
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“Night Nong”
For those wondering whether I was hijacked by aliens or fell into a rabbit’s hole, my long hiatus was not paranormally motivated, I’m afraid. Book marketing duties kept me sidelined for a bit, but happy I am to announce that Time Warped won the 2011 P&E’s Readers Poll for Best Young Adult Book, Danielle “Topanga” Fishel actually praised it in writing, and if that weren’t enough, the underdog Giants just won the Superbowl!!!… again… against the Patriots!!!
Only a really juicy paranormal story would make me come down from such a celebratory high. But, I simply could not resist the Chinese “Cat-boy” with night vision eyes!
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Breed Love
What can you say about a high school senior born to breed love, as his name aptly implies.
I had wanted to help spread his Christmas message during the holidays, but end of the year stuff had me in its clutches.
Of course, it’s never too late to pass on an inspired message when you receive one, so here’s my gift to all of you 2012 doom and gloom naysayers.
Ben Breedlove was born 18 years ago with a serious heart disease (HCM), which made it difficult for his heart to pump blood. Somehow, he was able to cheat death 3 times, but on the fourth occasion, death dealt his family a heavy blow I’m sure they’re still reeling from.
Ben, on the other hand, was not afraid to meet his maker. That’s because he already met her 3 times before.
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Everlasting Lovejoy
Recently in the news, a brave young comet by the name of Lovejoy decided to test the theory that love cannot die and brazenly set off in the direct path of the sun.
Having previously observed 2000 comets melt in the blaze of the sun’s megawatt smile, scientists feared the worst for Lovejoy. Leaving home without the proper sunblock was an unthinkable risk for any young comet to take. Where was its Moon mother when all of this was going on? Probably still recovering from its recent eclipse, I’d presume.
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